February 2020 Communication Tip

Feedback and Advice

With the January StarCard scores in, it’s time for my monthly communication tip.

This month, I wanted to focus on feedback and advice.

 

As with all skills, communication can be improved with effective feedback.  We can use feedback as advice about where to put our efforts and what skills to work on.

Feedback should come from almost everywhere (hence the “360 Eval” some of you may be aware of).  Feedback can come from anyone in the room, perhaps a nurse or social worker or physician is asked by a colleague after an intense family meeting, “How do you think that discussion went?  What worked well?  What didn’t work well?”

 

Today, I wanted to provide a form advice from a patient.  It always useful to listen to the feedback from a patient, to be able to understand the clinician-patient interaction from the patient’s perspective. Below is a patient’s perspective on getting bad news, described in the poem What the Doctor Said by Raymond Carver.

 

What the Doctor Said

 

He said it doesn't look good

he said it looks bad in fact real bad

he said I counted thirty-two of them on one lung before

I quit counting them

I said I'm glad I wouldn't want to know

about any more being there than that

he said are you a religious man do you kneel down

in forest groves and let yourself ask for help

when you came to a waterfall

mist blowing against your face and arms

do you stop and ask for understanding at those moments

I said not yet but I intend to start today 

he said I'm really sorry he said

I wish I had some other kind of news to give you

I said Amen and he said something else

I didn't catch and not knowing what else to do

and not wanting him to have to repeat it

and me to have to fully digest it

I just looked at him

for a minute and he looked back it was then

I jumped up and shook hands with this man who'd

just given me

something no one else on earth had ever given me

I may even have thanked him habit being so strong.

 

-Raymond Carver

A New Path to the Waterfall

 

 

Pearls of wisdom can be a great help when you are looking for a little inspiration.

Starting next month in this space, I’ll introduce you to some of our top Cancer Center communicators and invite them to share some of their own advice about communicating well.

 

Until then, this month, try seeking some feedback about your communication skills.

And, as always, feel free to share your communication experiences with me.

 

All My Best,

Mike