July 2021 Communication Tip

Relationship Center Care/We Language

This month’s communication tip won’t take you any extra time… it’s just about substituting 1 word.

We often talk about “patient-centered care”-- an effort to focus on what is important to the patient.  While patient-centered care is absolutely important, we must not forget that there are two people in the room (or in the zoom).  You are there too.

Some have talked instead about “relationship-centered care,” as a way to recognize the additional importance of the clinician in medical care.  Our importance is not just because of expertise, it is a recognition of the importance of each of us as a person.

Rachel Remen, MD, who has written bestselling books about healing and the clinician-patient relationship, has said “Who you are matters as much as what you know.” 

Consider a slight adjustment to your language in talking about medical care with patients.  Rather than “what are you going to choose?” or “what am I going to do,” consider “we” language—“Let’s understand what we are facing here” or “What are we going to do here.”  Just a simple substitution of a pronoun, but this might have profound implications for how well a patient feels supported and how alone they might feel in the land of illness—a land so foreign to most but so familiar to us as providers.

We know how much pronouns matter to help create safety and inclusivity around gender identity.  In healthcare communication, pronouns matter as well to communicate to patients our promise of non-abandonment.

All my best,

mike